Week 1

It's been a quietly monumental week for me.  I'll get to the details on that in just a moment, because I want to cover the whole week and show off a few family pictures as well....

Starting with last Sunday, when the kids and my mom made fairy and dinosaur terrariums.  This was a fun project that I'm fairly certain Ma Pam ended up finishing on her own, but nevertheless included a lot of group planning and input, especially on shopping ventures.  The finished results are pretty great and are currently gracing the kids rooms....Reese with her fairy terrarium:

And Weston with his dino terrarium (and appropriately matching shirt, of course)

Sunday night, we celebrated the end of a successful swim team season at the Waves awards banquet.  I knew they would both receive participating trophies, but it was a fun surprise when Weston won the "most improved 4-year-old boy" award and corresponding trophy.  In fact, he was the only four-year-old boy on the team, but that minor detail did not impact the excitement of winning the category!  Or the big honking trophy.  It was so funny to watch the wheels in his brain turning as he initially accepted the smaller participating trophy while staring at the much larger special achievement trophies lined up on the table.  Those who know Weston will appreciate that he immediately started trying to reason with the coach, who was otherwise occupied making her speech.  "I need to tell you something...."  But then he ended up with the coveted trophy after all. He was pretty sure he won it for being "the best in the world." Actually it was more of a reflection of his overall 45 second time improvement in the freestyle stroke, but clearly humility is a skill in addition to swimming.

Reese was happy with her participation trophy and, more than anything, happy to play with friends.  I'm proud to announce that she legally swims all four strokes with great skill. She was one of the younger ones in her age group this year, but she won a freestyle heat, participated in a few relays, and most importantly, had a good time.  That's my girl!

Overall, swim team was an excellent experience this year!

On Monday, I said goodbye to my husband and kiddos and headed down to Houston with my parents for the week to begin my radiation treatments. While it's hard to be away from home, we had a really enjoyable visit.  We ate lots of great food (which seems to be par for the course in Houston!), scoped out some good shopping, and did plenty of walking.

Calamari and Brussels sprouts, anyone? We covered a lot of culinary ground, going down to Galveston for Guido's, as well as trying Thai, Italian, Greek, and Southern themed restaurants.  Dad even cooked for us one night at the hotel!  It was wonderful to have my parents with me for support as I start this new chapter, the final leg of the treatment triathlon.

We also had the special treat of experiencing a private tour of St. Martin's, coordinated by my father-in-law and led by a wonderful docent, Lee.  Before the tour, we briefly visited with Scott, who is a dear friend of my in-laws, an exceedingly kind person, and a VIP on Team Shelly, as he is the one who connected us with my amazing oncologist.  THANK YOU, SCOTT!

The tour was a real treat.  We learned so many interesting things about the construction of the building, the background on the intricate needle work and stunning stained glass windows, as well as the woodwork and the art.  We also thoroughly enjoyed an organ demonstration.  A wonderful visit to a beautiful sacred space!

While we did have some fun, the focus was, of course, the radiation treatments.  I'm grateful to say I kicked off my radiation with a most helpful and supportive "team": my dad was our driver, navigating us to my appointments with plenty of time to spare.

Mom waited with me/for me in the women's changing room, which was great support.  I think she's probably tired of watching Dr. Oz in the waiting area after this week, but it was so very nice to have her there as I got used to this new routine.  Monday was a test run, and Tuesday through Friday I received radiation.  I had previously gone in for a CT scan, at which point they placed five tiny tattoos around the area to be radiated. Despite this earlier visit and the dry run on Monday, I hadn't let the reality of undergoing seven weeks of radiation sink in. I was surprised that I was somewhat emotional and trying to "hold it together" as everything truly began on Tuesday.  

To be clear, radiation is a very quick process (in and out in ten minutes) and so far, no pain or side effects.  So after chemo and surgery, it is a much less grueling treatment. But I think I was a little overwhelmed with undergoing yet another treatment that is hard on my body, that could have long term side effects, that requires me to be away from home for the better part of almost two months.  I also received my first Lupron injection this week...an injection that effectively shuts down my ovaries, which I will get once a month for the next ten years. I will also begin to take a daily aromatase inhibitor next week, also running a ten year course.  All of this combined led to a little bit of a pity party on my end, but that quickly passed.  However, as a dear friend pointed out in an email, it is such a blessing that I have had my two wonderful children.  That really put a lot in perspective.  Since then, I have talked with two amazing friends who have walked this path, and they both reinforced the enormously powerful cancer-fighting effect of radiation treatment. Which is fantastic, because each treatment is so quick. You can't even tell anything is happening, frankly.  But clearly, it is effective!

This has been kind of a rambling lead-up to the point that I am happy to report that I have a week of radiation under my belt, that it went well (especially with the support of my parents), and that I think I've made peace mentally with not only six more weeks of radiation, but also the side effects of the hormone therapy that I am beginning.  

Mom and I pose at the not particularly glamorous entrance to the radiation clinic, which is about the only picture I will likely get, as mobile phones are not allowed in the room with the machine.

One down, six to go!

Sea Island

So I have a pretty good excuse for being a little bit behind on blogging lately....I was cleared by my oncologist and surgeon for travel two weeks after my surgery, so I was actually able to tag along on a family trip to Sea Island, Georgia!  I've been listening to the plans being made for this vacation for several months now, but in a passive way, since I was certain I wouldn't be going on this trip.  Matter of fact, it was specifically timed to occur during my post-surgery convalescence.  But after the stress of the pathology report, once I got the clearance to go, I was determined to be with the family! It was such a wonderful opportunity to spend time with everyone, especially since I won't be seeing David or the kids during the week for the next seven weeks, as I'm undergoing radiation treatment Mondays-Fridays, with quick trips home on the weekends.  It was also a very relaxing and fun visit to an entirely new locale!

Naturally, there was lots of beach play...I mainly stayed out of the sun due to post-chemo skin sensitivity concerns, but not entirely!

The B4 walking together!

David and the kids constructing a goopy sandcastle.

Also included was a lot of pool time at the wonderful Beach Club facility.

I love this series of photos...I have no idea if this is what actually happened, but here is how I imagine it:

Weston, forlorn because he can't locate his older cousin, Bain....

Reunited with Bain, hurray!

OHMYGOODNESSI'MSWIMMINGWITHBAIN!  Life is perfect!

Reese also had a blast swimming with the cousins, and riding the water slide. Apparently she used Bain's phone to film herself sliding, which I have yet to watch!  I'm sure it's pretty entertaining.

I never actually made it poolside, but it looked and sounded like a fantastic time!

Christine and Blake are in the know and hooked us up with Bingo night reservations at The Cloisters.  We have played bingo with friends at the VFW in Austin, but this was, um, slightly fancier. Coats required for the gentlemen. Clown pants optional.

Set in a fancy ballroom, with a former Vegas performer announcing the numbers.  The picture doesn't do it justice (mainly because it's the only image in this post that I took instead of my professional-level father-in-law photographer), but the room was very ornate and beautiful.

We had so much fun!  Here's part of our group, warming up!

B4 again!  Weston was totally into it, as you can tell.

"Ooooooooh 66!"  The W5 and 500 of our closest friends get into the game.

Bain was our family's winning representative that night.  He was the first legitimate bingo winner of the evening. I think there were a record 8 bungo's (false bingo claims) prior to his win.  Each of those folks were fined $1 for their error, and I'm pretty sure that all went back directly to Bain.  Another contingency returned two night later and Georgia won for our group that night.  Way to represent, y'all!

Honestly, it just wasn't Weston's cup of tea.  At all.  Apparently bingo gives him the crazy eyes. But he behaved very well and was able to enjoy the customary post-bingo cookies and milk!

Another favorite of the trip: our many morning and evening beach-combing walks, dependent upon whether it was low tide.

Walking along the beach in the morning....

...as well as the evening were such fun times.  It was a relaxing and fun way for everyone to experience the beach at their own pace.

The marine life evident on the beaches is very interesting and much more abundant than what we see on the Texas beaches, at least the ones that we frequent. David and I became quite concerned about the plight of the sand dollars.  No one else seemed too worried.

We found many of the dead and dried sand dollars, but also several of the living ones as well, such as this little guy here. 

Did you know that sand dollars are endangered?  And that it's illegal to take the live sand dollars as mementos? Shocking, isn't it, Weston?

But in all seriousness, these were really some of my favorite moments from the trip. There's just something healing about walking on a beach, breathing in the balmy salt air and looking at the ocean.  

I should also mention that David and I celebrated our 12th anniversary on Father's Day. We marked the occasion with a dinner with our parents and kids, which was wonderful and seemed perfect. I am so grateful that God matched us up so many years ago. I love this man tremendously!

There was always something fun planned: groups went fishing and golfing...

Bain caught this cool fish.

Some of us met another group as they returned to the dock.  Many sharks and sting ray were caught and released.

One crab was not.

The handsome golfing guys!

On our last night, we went to dinner at the Lodge.  This picture of Reese makes me flash forward to teenage years for some reason! Aaaaah!

Dinner on the last night. It was a wonderful chance to be together one last time before we had to bifurcate and go our separate ways the next day.

It was an amazing trip.  I'm behind grateful that I was able to spend time with my family and to relax in such a beautiful place.  Thank you to Lorne and Michelle, my parents, the W5 and of course the B4 for making it such a wonderful week.  I love you all!

No place like home

I'm behind on my blogging duties!  Before I dive into vacation updates, I want to give a big shout

out to my in-laws for transforming our yard and garage into a HGTV-worthy makeover while I recovered in Houston.

Michelle and Lorne worked so very hard to completely organize our garage, which is so beautifully spotless now....

Michelle transformed our back patio into a much more liveable and enjoyable space.  Isn't it pretty?  Such a lovely spot for morning coffee!

Lorne worked hard to clear up the trees and bushes in the backyard, as you can see (don't be fooled by Captain America, trying to take credit)!

Lorne also arranged for our fence to be painted, which was very overdue, and updated the hose bibs.  I honestly was so shocked when I returned, I could hardly speak.  I also kept looking around for the camera crew...

The home and garden transformations were amazing and such a wonderful welcome, but these kiddos made the return even more festive, complete with crowns, sparkly dresses and handmade welcome signs....

Our golf cart arrived right before we pulled in, so we gladly took it out for a neighborhood spin.

I'm no expert in return-from-surgery-welcome-home events, but I find it hard to believe that this could be topped!  From my beautiful kids' faces to the garage and yard makeover, it couldn't have been better. I'm so grateful to my family for making this happen.  We are having a great vacation but just blogging these pictures makes me excited to return home tomorrow...there's no place like home sweet home!

Reporting on THE Report

I got the results of my final pathology report last week and have spent some time on an emotional roller coaster tying to understand, digest and process the information.  My breast surgeon called while I was waiting in my radiation oncolgist's office last Thursday, so I rushed outside to take the initial call.  Not the best setting or conditions to take such an important call, so my understanding of the details was somewhat skewed.  She told me that my margins were negative (sounded good to me), two of the total thirteen lymph nodes they took were positive for cancer (sounded bad), and then she said the tumor measured five centimeters but that wasn't always an accurate reading so she needed to speak with my oncologist (sounded confusing). There was also some confusion about my HER2 status, which ended up being unfounded, as I'm still considered HER2 negative. So I felt like I was in a holding pattern for a little while.  

I did some research and tried to glean whatever additional information I could find...which wasn't much.  I kept on with my scheduled appointments, which included getting my final drain out on Tuesday (hallelujah!) and getting the go-ahead to raise my arms above my head. So we went almost immediately to a CT scan that same afternoon, where I had to hold my left arm (the one with the huge axillary dissection scar across my armpit) in an extremely extended position, straight above my head and slightly bent so I could grip a handle for about thirty minutes for imaging and tattooing. They were taking images that will help determine my course of radiation.  I almost fainted due to the pain from contorting into that position with that arm. I don't think that is what the nurse had in mind when she cleared me to lift my arms!

On Wednesday, my mom and I visited the breast surgeon first thing.  She told us the report was disappointing, as they had hoped the chemo would be more effective, at which point she told us there was quite a bit of cancer still present in the tissue they analyzed. She did remind us that the tissue was removed from my body, but in all honesty, it didn't sound very promising.  I have to admit that I cried pretty hard after leaving that appointment, because even though we hadn't received much info at the meeting (she mentioned that my oncologist would give us the full report), things sounded grim to me.

David and my dad joined us at the afternoon appointment with my oncologist, which luckily had a decidedly more positive tone. My oncologist spent a considerable amount of time walking us through the findings of the report and answering our seemingly endless questions. First of all, the margins refer to the edges of the surgical area, so it is in fact good for those to be negative.  Just in case, radiation will zap any cancer cells that might be hanging on in the breast/neck/chest wall area. The two positive lymph nodes really weren't an enormous surprise, seeing as how the initial ultrasound turned up two problematic nodes, and the one they biopsied was in fact positive. However, that does increase the chances that cancer "seeds," or clumps of cells, made their way into my body.  Hopefully the chemo took care of the seeds, but if not, I will be taking medication to block the production of estrogen.  Estrogen is what very clearly fuels the cancer in my body, so these medications will ostensibly starve any existing cancer while preventing future cancer from growing and spreading. Dr. O assured me that these meds, which I will take for ten years, are extremely effective with my type of cancer.  Additionally, results from a new study were released last week, and it looks like I'll be taking a related but slightly different form of medication than what I had originally thought, due to positive results from the study. Yay, medical progress! Finally, Dr. O explained that while the report still measures the tumor at 5cm, it is actually just a measurement that finds small clumps of cancer in the area that previously held the large solid tumor. So while the measurements say 5cm, it isn't a solid mass but small specks. The chemo was effective in that it crumbled the tumor from one large mass into much smaller masses, but it did not eradicate the tumor entirely.  This explains a lot because I was baffled by this particular component, as we could hardly feel the tumor anymore!  Furthermore, Dr. O told us that 97% of patients with estrogen-fueled cancer, such as yours truly, do not see complete elimination of cancerous masses.  Of course I'd love to be in the minority, but my results were not unexpected, at least to my oncologist.

I inquired about further body imaging (onc does not support unnecessary scans or images), immunotherapy (something to keep an eye on but not relevant to breast cancer just yet), clinical trials (nothing appropriate at the moment). He knows I'd like to be as aggressive as possible. For now, the treatment plan remains the same: radiation is next on the docket, and I will be starting the ten year course of medication soon as well. 

The bottom line: sure, it would be great for all traces of the tumor to be gone and to have no lymph nodes involved, but it isn't shocking to get the results that we did get.  And while they aren't perfect, they certainly seem manageable, and we have a solid plan in place. Dr. O even went as far as to declare me "cancer free!" I'll take that! Along with my daily dose of estrogen blockers!

So, with many more answers, a greater understanding of where we stand, and a very sore underarm, we packed up and left Houston--for the time being. My aunts were kind enough to come down and help us haul all of our stuff back to Austin. My in laws kept very busy here in Austin, and I will expand on their amazing home projects in an upcoming post. Suffice to say, it was a very happy and pleasant homecoming!

My six week course of radiation begins on June 23rd, so I will be back in Houston again soon, but I am enjoying a few nights at home and I have been cleared to join my family on vacation next week. Dr. O said it will take 1-2 years for all of this to move from the very forefront of my thoughts at all times to the back of my brain, but I'm going to try to push it aside while we unwind at the beach next week. Maybe not all the way to the back, but at least off to one side. Thank you for all of the concerned emails and texts. I hope this explanation answers some of the questions you have asked or been wondering.

Reminders of home

I'm laying pretty low in Houston right now. More on that in a future post, because right now my heart is at home....even if I'm not there!

The kids had their final swim meet of the season, and look who handily shaved 25 seconds (!!!) off his freestyle time to win his heat!

I love my father-in-law's email description of Weston's freestyle triumph:

"Intrepid and focused, he stood at pool's edge ready for the coach to launch him. He plunged in without reserve and simply plowed ahead, never being in any position except first. He hit the wall about five yards ahead of the second man, and then turned to observe the lanes littered with those who fell victim to his Super Hero inspiration guiding his every stroke and kick.

He earned a First Place ribbon for that exceptional effort, and deserved it."

I love the play-by-play description accompanying the pictures, and I'm thrilled for our little guy's progress!

Another welcome reminder of home came today with a visit with my dear friend Monique! We chatted about everything going on and life in general. She kept me company in the hotel room while my parents ran errands, and I swear time flew by. It was so nice to see friends!

The rest of M's family cane by for a short visit on their way out of town. Nico took a pic of M, me & Neal;

And I got a pick with sweet Nico too!

Thank you, Mehta family, for a great morning! 

I'm definitely homesick but we are enjoying Houston. We've been eating lots of good lunches at all sorts of restaurants and have been on short shopping outings, in addition to doctor visits. Tomorrow we plan to venture to a small park near our hotel for a short walk and maybe we will make it to a movie. So we are keeping somewhat busy, in between naps!  Hope you're all having a good start to summer.